My Fight With Cancer

So I was sitting at the local bar, all alone. I was waiting for that faitful phone call that could irrevocable change your life. It’s obvious that the entire week was the most tense of my entire life. It’s terrible to say, but the bar’s alcohol helped to calm my jangled nerves. I was on my fourth pint since I arrived when out of no where it came. When I least expected it, which is how such things come to you in life.

“Crash”, went the door. He swaggered in like he owned that joint. He scanned the room. Then he announced, “I’m looking for Ron!”

The bar was silent since he came in and after he called out people started to clear the area. After a few moments I was the only one left. That is, except for Bill, the local drunk, passed out at his seat in the corner. The man locked eyes with me. He came over and stood beside me, dwarfing me with his size. I got up slowly, but with great defiance and beer in hand.

“Cancer!” I said. “You shot my paw, and kicked my dog.”

“That’s right, now I’ve come for you.” he pushed me, and I stumbled back. He was strong.

He put up his fists. “You should defend your self.” he said. I did. I threw my glass and drenched him. He grit his teeth.

“You made me wet.”

“You made me spill my beer.”

It was on.

Just before the first swing came there was a clicking and a double barrel in our faces.

“I don’t want any of this in my establishment.” The bar tender said. “Take it out side.”

Cancer backed away slowly to the exit, never taking his eyes off of me. And then my phone rang. It was the call I was waiting for.

My cat had kittens.

“Kittens!” Cancer said with great delight. “I love kittens!”

“Really, then why don’t you come and play with them?”

“Yay!”

“I like kittens” said the bar tender, in a tone of voice that hopes for an invitation.

“Then come along!”

Bill the local drunk then woke up. He knew what we were talking about. He frowned and gave us a very puppy dog expression.

“Aw, Bill. You know your invited too.”

And that afternoon Bill the local drunk, the bartender, Cancer and I had a delightful time playing with Mitten's darling little kitties.

The End